one time my girlfriend texted me this blurry picture of a thermometer and there was a second where i had a heart attack because i thought it was a pregnancy test but then i came to the realization that we’re lesbians
i’m into girls and guys but i’m also really into pasta
isnt it weird how anything can happen in football
"hey gurlfrand let’s swap outfits omg<3"
Yesterday I saw a tweet that said “5SOS are the Green Day of our generation” and I had a good laugh. Green Day are the Green Day of our generation.
nothing lasts forever (except the WinRAR free trial)
Or: let’s talk about how Louis’ golden voice holds every chorus together
I hate that I take so long to reply. Like, everything distracts me. I can be in the middle of replying and look at my wall like. “Damn.. what kind of white is this? Is this a pale white? Off brand white?”
hey, whatever happened to franz ferdinand?
the band, i mean
not the archduke of austria
i know what happened to the archduke of austria
*has a bag of sour gummy worms* hey you want one *you go to grab a blue-red one* *I immediately stop you* no not that one
Shaving your legs. More like yoga in the shower with razor blades.
so sorry for my delayed response to this email, i have been very swamped being a confused and frightened idiot who can’t do basic life tasks like respond to her emails
i’ll be like 40 w/no kids and people will say “aw i’m so sorry for you” and i’ll be like how was the fucking wiggles reunion tour asshole i went to italy last week for fun and didn’t have to hire a sitter
This is a very sad mentality. To think oneself more important than that of progeny is the sign of a failed human life.
so the wiggles concert wasn’t as good as you thought it would be huh
How to know which boy you like:
1. Get very drunk
2. You will cry about the boy you like
Apparently the boy I like is pasta. This comes as no surprise.